Friday, August 04, 2006

Those Scientologists have GREAT comebacks

There are a lot of unfortunate things about times square: the people that aggressively try to herd you onto a tour bus, the people that think they can walk veeerrry slooowly and stop in the middle of the sidewalk (even when it's 112 degrees) when all a sister wants to do is get to work, the pockets of warm trash smell...and then there are those whose job it is to pass out flyers. we don't really mind these people because, you know, they're just doing their job. every once in a while, i'll take their flyers because i feel bad about their job circumstances. however, i always feel dirty and tricked whenever i look down to see if the flyer is anything good (once it was a $2 lunch discount coupon!) and it turns out to be scientology propaganda. another unfortunate thing about the times square area is that the scientology center is nearby, so there are many of these little minions sneaking around in plainclothes (and not, as one would assume, in a stretchy, one piece alien outfit complete with footies) trying to turn the citizens of the world onto their side. usually, whenever they sneakily dupe me into accepting one of their dianetics flyers, i'm immediately disgusted and try to angrily one-handed crumple it up right in front of their faces...if i see one approaching me, i turn them away with a "no thanks" before they get a word out. today, i met a special man that would not be denied. kind of. here is our interaction:

ALIEN MAN: (thrusts flyer toward me) We're having a FREE screening of a Dianetics movie-
ME: (laughs in an "i'm better than you" way)No, thanks.
ALIEN MAN: (continues walking alongside me) Have you ever heard about it?
ME: (in an "i'm not buying what you're selling way") Yes.
ALIEN MAN: Good. (continues walking next to me for about 4 seconds. Says nothing. Turns and walks away.)

Coolface:1 Scientology: Katie Holmes

1 comment:

Miche said...

My favorite part of Times Square are the French girls who ask to get their picture taken with the guys who dress up like aliens outside your work.