Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Season's Greetings!

Norman the Gingerbread Cyclops wishes everyone happy holidays from his forest of christmas trees.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Subway Spotlight: Holiday Harry

All of our subway spotlights are special treasures, and holiday harry is no exception. how fitting that he get illuminated on this first official day of winter (right? it's like today, right?)

holiday harry caught my eye in the wee hours of sundee morn on an F train into brooklyn. he walked on wearing his santa hat with a melodica placed firmly in position. he then started in on a holiday medley, with the following songs flowing into each other in the following order:

Flinstones theme
Addams Family theme
Happy Birthday (to Jesus, one assumes)
Hava Nagila
For he's a Jolly Good Fellow (again, probs about jesus)
We Wish You a Merry Christmas
Deck the Halls
Silent Night
The First Noel
Silver Bells
and finishing off with a little Charge

Happy Holidays, Holiday Harry! Thanks for brightening up my 3am. Speaking of 3am...i was walking home from the train a little after that hour, when i spotted (but barely, since he was in all white) this fellow standing in the middle of the street, surrounded by falling snow, staring into nothingness. do you think he was starting his day, ending it, or just taking a mid-sleep breath of fresh air?

Thursday, December 11, 2008

numbers and things

i got a call on my cell phone earlier today from a number and area code i didn't recognize. i have a rule where i don't answer a call from number I don't know, so i let it go to voicemail. no message was left, which made me think it was a wrong number. I googled the area code to see where this person was calling from, and it belonged somewhere in Colorado. i know no Coloradoaieans (that's a word, right?). A couple hours later I decided to google the full number because it's rare that i get mystery calls on my cell that don't leave a message. So i insert the number into my search box (hehe, box):


and several pages pop up of the "Report this phone number" variety. Apparently it's some sort of scam and everyone's pissed because everyone's on the Do Not Call list (as am I). And it seems as though this phone call is going around, like, this week. has anyone else gotten this call?

secondly, while i'm here, can i just talk about the pick up artist for a second? i finally watched the finale. finally finale. and, like...SIMEON?! For REAL? listen, the crop this season was nothing to throw your panties at, but simeon is a MASTER PICK UP ARTIST now? He's such a creep! why were the two finalists the ones with my most hated openers? the caper one matt loves that becca pointed out. and simeon's awkwardly delivered: "Hey, what movie is this from? Nobody. puts baby in a corner." Kosmo looks positively genius next to these guys. and at least when kosmo won, there was a marked difference from beginning to end. Simeon is still a bundle of creepy energy and now his ego is inflated.

something else worth mentioning-- when the guys were doing their field test, one of them had cornered a few girls, but was hesitating on making the move to invite them to his bedroom. (The challenge was to invite a girl back to the bedroom and seduce her) Mystery, watching with his wingpeople, says "Take what's yours." TAKE WHAT'S YOURS he says! because these dorks learned some stupid game and way of talking, once they approach a group of girls, those girls are rightfully theirs. because they are men and they choose their womenfolk. it has nothing to do with what the girl wants. right?

lastly -- i'm trying to caffeine it up today since i'm barely crawling through. i had a poor excuse for coke from the fountain earlier, and i couldn't go back. when i was getting my lunch, i decided to try out the Cherry Coke Zero, because, why not. and you know what guys...it really isn't so bad. Cherry coke!! With no calories!!

oh wait, one more... Lastly for realz-- i think i might have to retire the jeans i'm wearing today to "walking around the abode" wear. i knew it was wearing thin in that dreaded thigh spot, but it wasn't until just a second ago when i realized there's a half-dollar sized window to my skin on the right leg, and another slightly smaller one on the left. if i wear these in public again, i'm going to end up pregnant. man, my pants never used to wear in that area! i used to have to retire pants when the knees got huge holes in them. and now the thigh hole seems to be happening to all my pants at once! (or at least all the pants i've had for the last four years.) i don't need this many cutoffs! unless i were a never-nude...

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

wake me up before you go-go

As you all know I’ve never really been a coffee drinker. This is hurting me right now as I am nearing the end of my latest 16-day workathon. For starters, I look like shit right now. I could be straight out of the Nightmare Before Christmas or Corpse Bride. I should put curtains over all the mirrors in my apartment. I caught a glimpse of my visage this morning before leaving for the day and I almost yelped in fear. I think this is probably the longest streak I’ve done...I did 12 days a couple weeks ago, but 16 is a harsh mistress. I seem to be mildly narcoleptic, falling asleep whenever I’m seated. I get a nice nap in on the hour commute to and from times square, I’m still passing out on my couch whilst trying to whittle down my dvr list, and the other day I came very, very close to falling asleep sitting at the computer. At work. In my defense, the floor I work on keeps the lights off and the temperature down. So I was snuggled in my scarf. I also wear these big headphones so it’s like I was shut out from the world, in a cold scarfy womb.

Because of this, I was faced with a dilemma. I needed to wake up. Since I quit the daily drinking of Coke (and the fountain soda offered in the building is usually less than impressive), that option flew out the window. The Energy Vitamin Water that I normally count on to wake me up (and take me to the pee room at least seven times throughout the day) wasn’t available where I purchased my bagel that morning. I headed to the pantry to check out my options. My first choice, delicious Milky Way hot chocolate, did nothing but fill my stomach with deliciousness. Before breaking out the big guns (and possibly a slew of other problems) by getting myself a cup of coffee, I opted for some green tea. You should also know that I’m not really a tea drinker either. However, it did the job with only the minor side effect of bad green tea breath.

I have three and a half more days to crawl through. If any of you see me (or have seen me in the last two weeks), please don’t be frightened. Soon I will be whole again. aka not scary looking.

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Prop 8 the Musical

my brother shared this with me and i just can't keep it to myself. there are at least 20 reasons this video is awesome. care to add any more???

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

things i still own but shouldn't volume #1

i am a huge packrat and am in the process of moving to a smaller (but lovely above ground) apartment. so i currently have the distinguished honor of going through all my crap i have accumulated over the years. most of it is a real loser's walk down memory lane. like my first find today.....toe socks! remember these? they were all the rage circa 1999 - 2000. i jumped headfirst into this trend and bought several pairs of them, worst of which are these ones - in a sickly blue color with little pink toenails painted on.

i distinctly remember people thinking that i had some sort of blood circulation problem when i wore these socks with flip flops.....and yet i still wore them...a lot....in public.

Monday, December 01, 2008

From the casting bag...

Let's start a new feature! Every now and again I will share with everyone a real casting notice which i find notable in some way.

Today's casting bag notice is for an AT&T outdoor event:

Promotional Models: Males, any ethnicity, 18-28. Good-looking and personable guys to serve. Must be comfortable riding segways or serving people coffee from a jetpack.