WRC: YOUR top 12

so i ended up watching the results show before i got a chance to finish watching the guys sing, but it appears i didn't really need to write much more than i had. I was correct about Jared getting kicked out. and THANK GOD, finally america got the hint and Antonella is out. carrie underwood comes out and performs and i wonder if she's thinking 'i'm a grammy winning superstar, when will i be able to stop coming back to perform for these wannabes'. then we get to the interesting part -- they send everyone through to the top 12 until 10 spots are filled and we're left with four people: Sanjaya, Sundance, Sabrina, and Haley. Sabrina and Haley are called up and you look at the two of them and think "oh, sara was right on because there's no WAY that sabrina/nosella is going home right now and that haley has ever done better than her. And then sabrina/nosella gets sent home and haley gets through to the top 12. and you can tell by how hard haley takes it that she knows it should've been her. then i start to wonder that maybe some people are confused and think that they are still voting for katharine mcphee when they vote for haley. then there's some long thing about how idol is gonna save the world or something. when it FINALLY ends, seacrest calls up sanjaya and sundance and the world thinks "well, sundance isn't gonna win, but he definitely deserves the last spot more than sanjaya does. god damn, sara is good!" so the last spot goes to sanjaya. it's just, really a waste of a top 12 spot there. he doesn't have a chance unless he is able to gain confidence and lose awkwardness and i will protest until these tween girls stop voting for the little boy whose hag they all totally want to be. ugh. i'm so over america sometimes.

WRC: Idol Top 16

****UPDATE****I still haven't seen all the boys, but apparently I clairvoyantly mentioned all the boys that were affected in last night's results show. i don't know when (or if) i'll get to watching the rest of that other show, so i'm probably not gonna add anymore to this post.

Here we go...we're almost at the top 12. Finally, i'll only have to commit one night to performances. I'm hoping that everything goes according to what i have planned in my noggin...otherwise it'll be a looong season having to put up with the lesser talented but more popular contestants.

BOYS:
BLAKE: i really don't think blake needs to worry about anything for the next 8 weeks or so
SANJAYA: It was nice of Sanjaya to let his sister sing for him this week. Too weak, too timid. He better be gone this week, because honestly, no matter what, this guy doesn't have a shot at taking this competition.
SUNDANCE: he'll most likely make the top 6, but he gets less appealing to me weekly. even though he finally found his footing again, he just hasn't blown my mind in performances like he did at his first audition.

** a stab in the dark guess until i see the rest of the episode -- sanjaya and jared (who is just so forgettable to me)

GIRLS:
JORDIN: she was pretty charismatic last night. i think she's safe.
SABRINA: no worries.
ANTONELLA: much better this week but seriously, she is zero compared to everyone else. she's amateurish and the weakest singer and kind of a brat. even the judges- in so many words- were like, america, kick this bitch out.
HALEY: just not good enough
STEPHANIE: woot! savannah!
LAKISHA: lakisha can do no wrong.
GINA: still reigning white girl
MELINDA: fucking melinda. sing me lullabies. i heart you.

if haley and antonella aren't out this week, i'll eat my fucking hat.

in other tragic news...

first the torso in a suitcase and now this!?!

I read on gothamist about some sad sad news for the city of new york... the party bike has been officially banned. sigh. this now means that groups of 6 overweight tourist can no longer pretend to pedal a huge bike-like contraption that takes up 3 lanes and goes five miles per hour through times square during rush hour. honestly, i don't know what goes through the lawmakers heads sometimes.

i guess it's back to those big red tour buses and single pedi-cabs for you out of towners!

SERIOUSLY, America?

America has been making some bad choices recently that not only make me uncomfortable, but that i think are forewarning us that the world is about to end. For one, Antonella Barba is still on American Idol. Secondly, Britney scrawls 666 on her forehead, screams that she is the antichrist, and then tries to kill herself with her bedsheets...and NOW, fucking WILD HOGS made 38 million at the box office. REALLY, AMERICA?!?!?! You're going to throw away your money on that load of crap??? are the four horsemen of the apocalypse really just john travolta, tim allen, martin lawrence, and william h. macy on motorcycles?!?! excuse me while i go vomit as much as i did when i read on the news that a woman's torso in a suitcase washed ashore.


Source: [MTV UK] via [BWE]
Source: [NY TIMES]

Subway Spotlight: Two Running Ladies!!

A few months ago, I was running a little bit early (a rare occasion indeed) and as i was heading to the train i was passed by two ladies fleeing towards the train exit. I thought to myself, i bet those bitches are late to work. Then today, another rare occasion where i was running the same amount of a little bit early I again am passed by these two same fleeing ladies. My question is this: why don't they just take an earlier train instead of sprinting to work every day?

WRC: AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL Y'ALL

a lotta stupid/hilarious things happened in these two hours, and i wish i had time to cover it all, but for now, we'll just do a general rundown of the girls...Oh also, i don't know all their names yet and i don't feel like looking them up, so I'll refer to them by affectionate nicknames for now...

Dummy - (kathleen i think...i'll never know her name for sure because she was kicked off) She was so dumb that it was trying, but it was such an innocent stupidity that it was kind of endearing and lovable. She really would've been a wealth of entertainment throughout the show if she stayed on. I've gotten hours of entertainment out of: judges: "We don't think you really understood the concept of the shoot." Kathleen: "I know, right?"

Russian Mail Order Bride - AMAZING that there is a mail order bride on top model. She's pretty but i think she needs some sunsilk hairapy

Jaslene - Welcome back, last year's trantastic latina. she's better looking this year but grossly skinny

Jael - i'm interested in seeing what she can do with her photos..i think she can probably do really well

Brows - She has great potential, i'm just waiting for the makeover episode to clean up those brows

Cassandra..? - Fugalicious definition make those boys go running. seriously, fug. like, no excuse, no escape fug. not even fashion fug.

2 Plus Size gals - awesome that there are two, but the plus size contestants never have a chance. i dare tyra to prove me wrong.

Sarah - i'm done with this self-righteous know it all.

Renee - In my opinion, one of the prettiest girls. Also, the most annoying and bitchy. i'm upset because i thought she'd represent hawaii, but now she's just shaming us.

Deana - i like her, but have no point of reference for her. at this point, i probably couldn't even pick her out of a lineup.

Soccer Mom - looks like a mixture of the worst parts of cameron diaz and sandra bernhardt

tyra jr - very pretty. her hair and brows can't wait for the makeover episode.

So there's the brief rundown of the potential 'models', soon i'll get a little more in depth- feel free to leave your thoughts about the episode in the comments!!

WRC: Idol Results

So...I was...kind of off on my guesses. i must've forgotten that america can be an idiot about things and people don't necessarily vote on who is the best. and the only reason i can think that antonella barba is still there is because of websites like that one vote for the worst place where they send massive amounts of votes to the worst contestant to make the producers (and me) angry. whatevs, at least i was 25% right with Alaina getting the boot. Her kickoff singing time was almost really embarrassing because she was crying so much she couldn't get a note out and then she called the girls down to hug her and it was kind of sad, but she was able to pull it together to sing a little bit. Leslie also got kicked off. I figured she'd go next week anyway, but i would have liked to see that QM perform again. Any little bit to unlock the mystery of leslie hunt.

kellie pickler performed and i was all 'kellie boobjob'? also, she's aged herself 20 years with that hairdo she was sporting. if i would've given fantasia a nickname last week i would've called her 'fantasia cheetohs'

So, I will admit that my opinion on nick was probably swayed because i thought he was cute, so i'll say i was way off on that one. but AJ?!?! not sweet lil most likely gay aj! he had a great voice and performed so much better than sanjaya. seriously. what the eff?

WRC: Top 20

BOYS
I think the following six boys are safe this week:

1.Chris Richardson - mmmmmm
2.Sundance Head - finally came back this week. we'll see if he can keep it up.
3.Blake Lewis - i just love this kid
4.Chris Sligh - so great. again - don't know about the whole "look" thing with him. Then again, taylor did win last year (zing!).
5.AJ Tibaldo - this cute lil monchichi finally did something where he sticks out.
6.Nick Pedro - i want to use his voice as a blanky.

I think unfortunately Sanjaya is done. he was too timid and it was like he was performing for an audience of 10. logistically i think probably phil (nosferatu) will be the second, but hear me out on this: brandon rogers.

Brandon Rogers pissed me the fuck off this week. I was completely warming up to him until his stupid bratty attitude. it is a show about singing, not who can 'feel' the best. it doesn't matter how much heart you put into it, you can't just make a dedication and rely on that as a great performance. he has to be able to stick out against these other boys and by doing a bullshit BORING performance and, when called out on it, acts like a complete baby, he isn't doing that. i think he maybe shot himself in the foot with the 'tude he gave the judges. he was likeable, now he's just stubborn and cocky.

GIRLS

1.Melinda Doolittle - i love love LOVE melinda doolittle. and that she's kind of dorky and all face.
2.Lakisha Jones - she has nothing to worry about this week...i did expect a little more from her out of this song, but she's still phenomenal.
3.Stephanie - big ups to savannah!
4.Nosella Noserton (Sabrina Sloan) - not her best today, but she'll be fine,
5.Gina Glocksen - reigning white girl
6.Jordin Sparks - aww. she loves her brother. she's melting my cold dark heart.

Ryan: "So antonella, what will you do differently this week?" Antonella: "Well, the entire nation has seen my scandalous pictures, so I'm counting on those votes." I think Antonella is for sure done. for sure. if it wasn't cemented by her terrible performance, it was by her ridiculous' tude. she sux. Beyond that, i'm guessing Alaina Alexander or Haley Scarnato. I really think there's only room for one white girl in the top 6 and neither of these girls are it.

Winter Reality Corner: first elimination

Hooray for my 50% accuracy rate! I was correct about Amy and Rudy getting the boot. The other two to go were Nicole Tranquilo (not a big surprise, but thought she would've lasted at least one more week) and Paul Kim (i bet you anything it was the bare feet that did it). Well, good for paul because now he can change his goddamn underwear. Something else notable was after Fantasia's performance Ryan pointed out that Quincy Jones was in the audience because he's a producer of the color purple, which fantasia will start performing in. Here's how the exchange went:

Ryan: And in the audience, one of the producers, Quincy Jones
Quincy (waves): The Color Purple is--(sees ryan not paying attention) The Color Purple...
Ryan: Thanks Fantasia! We'll be right back!!

I felt really sad for quincy jones bcs he just wanted to talk about his play. but then i also felt that maybe they shouldn't have mic'd him in the first place if they didn't want him to talk. just sayin

Winter Reality Corner

Welcome back to Winter Reality Corner! Hooray!! This season, I'm gonna attempt to do some American Idol stuff...but of course we all know that what really counts starts NEXT WEDNESDAY FEB. 28!!!!!!!! Here's a fair warning - the next season of America's Next Top model (or america's next top fug by the looks of it) starts wednesday at 8 and these posts are A LOT more fun if you know what's going on. ok, but back to right now. i was originally gonna put out my thoughts on each of the top 24, but i'm working too much right now to do that. and also, in a couple of weeks that number will be slashed in half, so let's not waste time on 12 people we'll forget about in a month. also, although tonight was the results show, i still haven't seen it. so i'll cover tuesday and wednesday here and whenever i get a chance to watch the results show, we'll see if i'm on my game this year. and finally, not to name drop or anything, but today i had a shoot with katharine mcphee (eep!) and to answer everyone's burning question -- yes, she does always have the magical dream sparkle with her. and i was doing linday's chicken impression (chaw chee chaw chee chaw chee) from arrested development really for no one but myself when i turn around mid-chicken impression to face katharine mcphee. awesome.

Top 6

Boys:
Blake - fantiddlyastic. glad he stopped beatboxing long enough to show his vocals.
Chris Richardson - mmmmmm
Brandon Rogers - has a fair chance
--these last three slots could go to almost anyone, for now i'll say--
Chris Sligh - great voice, maybe not a chance looks-wise
Senjaya Malakar - cute! adorable! that smile!
Phil Stacey - this guy or aj. or paul if he puts his shoes on. damn hippy.

I think Rudy Cardenas is for sure out and Sundance might go as well this week.

Girls:
Lekisha Jones- just amazingly amazing.
Melinda Dolittle- my personal fave. LOVE her!
Sabrina Sloan - you mean nosella noserton? she finally won me over.
Jordin Sparks - great voice. don't love her personality.
Stephanie Edwards- i think this might be fantasia barrino. also, she's great.
Gina Glockson - unless one of the other white girls steps it up.

*** Leslie Hunt is such a huge QM* i kind of want her to stick around to see just how wacky she can get.

*QM = question mark

This week I think there will be bad news for Amy Krebs and Alaina Alexander. Though Antonella did terribly and you know originally i thought her looks would carry her but that's what i thought about that stunningly gorgeous girl last year and she did not last long a'tall. on that note, really any of the six that aren't listed above i think could've gone tonight.

come back soon for the results!! (if you didn't already watch it)

Laundry List of Crazy

I just wanted to make a complete list of the crazy things going on with Britney Spears--if for nothing else but to try and wrap my own mind around what's happening here. I'm pressed for time, so I won't be able to find all the sources, but i'll do what i can.

Ok, so first off - she checked into rehab last week and less than 24 hours later she had already checked out. She then proceeded to get lips tattooed on her wrist and something else tattooed somewhere else (here's the part where no time for research comes in). Ok, and then she went and shaved her head and everyone in the world freaked out because our little britney is having a full-on collapse. So THEN I read yesterday that she checked back in to rehab and read today that she's already checked out again. i'm not sure if she understands the concept of rehab and that you shouldn't be checking out if you want a drink. i also found out today that there is speculation that the reason she shaved her head is because Kevin Federline was threatening to have her drug tested (which includes the hair) in order to get custody of the kids. at first i was completely anti-federline in all of this, but now i'm starting to wonder if he's maybe the best option for these poor tykes.

ok so now we get to the real crazy. Earlier, i was pointed toward wwtdd.com where i read that after britney shaved her head, she showed up at the mondrian hotel wearing an electric blue wig, no cash or credit cards with her, and was refused a room. the best part (and a beautiful mental image) was that she was seen later by the pool CRYING WHILE SHAVING HER LEGS. what a beautiful, fucked up tale of woe.

I'm not sure why I think this is funny (maybe it's not), but I was looking at the reviews for jet blue on yelp.com - here, and there have nothing but rave reviews (5 stars!)....obviously none of those reviewers flew jet blue last week!


Now what you've really been waiting for! I am in the process of composing a song about jet blue entitled the jet blues. It's to the tune of the kraft macaroni and cheese commercial where the kid sings a song that goes something like this:

I got the blues
kraft macaroni and cheese,
the blue box please!


When momma wants to please me
she's only got to cheese me!
I got the blues..


I figure the lyrics for my song will go something like this:


I got the blues
I flew jet blue and it blew
They didn't even reimburse me!


If you think this airlines great
ask the people who were stuck at the gate (for 12 hours)
I go the blues


So it's not as well thought out as I would like, but this is the best my brain can do at 9:00AM on a Wednesday morning.

p.s. - I have never actually flown jet blue, but i know some people who got screwed over by them last week. It obviously means that i should get some money back from jet blue by default.

today is my hero

Check out this clip of a girl on the today show who has been hiccuping for three weeks:

I really admire the interviewer for being able to keep a straight face, because i sure as hell would not have been able to. also - weird hiccup sound. also -- i've never seen a case of the hiccups where they were that frequent.

[Source]

Stop right now, thank you very much

if anybody knew me between the ages of 13 and 18, then they probably experienced my irrational obsession with the Spice Girls. I don't want to go to far into detail about how crazy I was about them, but lets just say that not only did I have posters, tshirts, and every album they put out (plus a few singles), but i also had a box of spice girl lollys -- you would lick the hard candy on the outside to reveal a bubble gum with one of the spice's faces on it. So imagine how pleased i was to read about a potential reunion like - wicked excited and although i have made major steps in moving past that phase in my life, i still sometimes revert back to my love for them. Anyway, this brings me to something i've been meaning to say for a while. Does anybody else think that lady sovereign is just sporty spice tryin to make a comeback?

blame it on the rain

So I just read here that a milli vanilli movie is in the works. at first i thought that it might be difficult to make an entire full length movie around their short blip on the pop culture radar, but then realized that theirs is a fascinating story-- after all milli (or vanilli -- actually he was the lighter skinned one, so he was probably vanilli) did kill himself after everything blew up in their faces. maybe rob and fab's tale could be epic oscar bait. really, the only thing that matters to me is that the actors playing them have someone else dubbing their voices. i really think that that's a pretty obvious thing that needs to happen. who would like to join me in petitioning the studio?

Valentines Day: A Cautionary Tale

Today, February 14, 2007 - Valentines Day
We would like to remind you of what being madly in love truely looks like...

Another former suitor throws his hat into the ring!

"I am Danielynn's real father"

File this in the awwwww category

Us CF employees were talking recently and I remarked how cute/strange it is to talk to our mothers on instant messenger. Sara said that when she has a conversation with her mom on im her mom always says goodbye and then types this:

Love,
Mom

I laughed to myself and though, well isn’t that adorable?

I happened to be talking to my mom online at the same time. It was time to say goodbye, and almost like it was scripted, I got the following im from her:

XOXO,
Mom

And the moral of that story is – “Great Moms think alike”

The lovely and talented...

Just wanted to let everyone out there know about this fantastic funny lady and CF friend, Yvonne. You can check out her myspace page here! but more importantly, just as it is in your daily itinerary to check out the Cooler than Stupid blog, it should also be in your sched to check out Yvonne's blog. She is pretty effin hilarious and it's the SMART kind of funny too!!! Definitely check it out because, unlike the unpredictable Becca and I (we might post four times a day, we might post once in four days) Yvonne has a new blog every day. and once you check it out, you will be amazed that she's able to do what she does on a daily basis.

the water main probaby isn't the only thing broken

so there was a water main break in west hempstead, long island. meh, interesting i guess...if you live in west hempstead. my awesome co-workers told me about this amazing footage of some dude walking along where the water main break was who falls in the water pretty bad - the best part is that it was caught on not one, but 2 local news channels, each from a different angle. some of the best unintentionally comedic material ever.

here's the angle that the local cbs station got:
http://wcbstv.com/video/?id=96232@wcbs.dayport.com

here's the angle that the local nbc station got (they don't have a direct link to just the video - but this is the link to the entire story - the video is over to the right)
http://abclocal.go.com/wabc/story?section=traffic&id=4991941

i do feel for the guy, but if you are gonna be on tv...it's such a good way to do it.