Wait, what?!

I was watching some late night television in the wee hours of this morning (you'll hear about the programming I settled on soon) when a commercial for Mirapex came on. If you don't know, Mirapex is the prescription drug for RLS, or Restless Leg Syndrome. Now, if you've ever been near me, you probably know that the energy i create by my shaky leg could power a small country. I used to identify this as a nervous habit, until people started asking what i was nervous about. So then, i stopped trying to defend it...it's just something i have to do most of the time. It's not necessary if, say, i'm sitting in a rocking chair or a swing. It's comforting, and I've never thought twice about it because my leg just kind of goes on autopilot. Anyway, my point is, i've never viewed it as some sort of affliction that needs to be medicated. Especially because i usually feel weird when my leg isn't shaking, so i wouldn't really want to be medicated for it. and really, it's kind of silly. i mean, it's silly that there's a medication for this, right? Also, I don't know much about the RLS, so my need to constantly shake my leg might not have anything to do with it. It doesn't matter, because my point here is about Mirapex and the commercial that aired for it.

The commercial went on as standard drug commercials do: Avant-garde animations show the everyday person bothered with some sort of wavy line representing the malady, a soothing woman's voice saying it'll all be okay if you take this pill, and the reading off of the side effects. I made sure to pay attention here because i was like "well, if i do have RLS and can legitimately get a prescription, what kind of fun do i have to look forward to?" (Usually the mention of 'nausea' turns me off) So the soothing lady starts off with "may cause drowsiness during everyday activities like driving." so i'm all 'score!' and then she's like "alcohol can increase the effects" and i'm like 'keep on singing to me lady' and then she's like 'may cause dizziness upon standing' and i'm thinking 'i wouldn't be standing too much then' and THEN, once you think she's done, she goes and tacks on "please consult your doctor if you experience increased impulses for gambling or sexual activity" and i was all 'wha-wha-whaaaattt?!' What kind of mystical drug is this? and how was soothing voice lady able to say this with a straight face? and how come drugs are so fucking crazy!?! does anyone have an answer?