Friday, October 06, 2006

Subway Spotlight: Smelly Pete

Today's SS honoree, like one before him, is not an entertainer of any sort, but kind of more like a crazy homeless guy that's been spotted on the F line more than once. And by crazy, we mean probably legitimately schizophrenic. And by homeless, we mean smells like pee.

Normally Smelly Pete sleeps on the train and positions himself in a way that prevents others from sitting beside or in front of him. Also preventing others from sitting near him is the gag-inducing smell emanating from his person.

Well, today, Smelly Pete was half sleeping/half mumbling nonsense. There was no real cause for concern until the words "blows up" were overheard at frequent intervals. It turns out this wasn't any sort of threat, but rather his favorite phrase. Here are some real life examples of its usage:

TRAIN CONDUCTOR: This is Carroll Street.
SMELLY PETE: Fuck Carroll Street, I hope it blows up.

TC: There is an A train across the platform.
SP: Fuck the A train, I hope it blows up.

and our personal favorite:

TC: Stand clear of the closing doors.
SP: Fuck the closing doors, I hope they blow up.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I always felt that way but was too afraid to say it.