Thursday, November 20, 2008

FRC: The Pickup Artist Episode 4

Rian returns from elimination - hugzzz. Rian's sort of crying and Brian has intestinal distress. He farts in the bathtub....even though there's nobody on the toilet. I can appreciate the sentiment that he didn't wan the people outside to smell his fart though.

Ugh. The awkward, yet ultimately entertaining "how far have you gotten with a woman" discussion. They zone in on Brian since he has so little experience, and he tells the story of a woman who's boob he grabbed. Now this was the first thing that Brian said that ever made me angry with him. "She sort of looked like Shamu", please, if you really respect women - don't ever say a woman looks like a whale. It's offensive to her, and pretty much everyone. End of my lecture.

They play a goofy deedleedum type tune while Rian describes his past experiences with women....

Enter professional sexologist Erin & her sidekick Whitney.

this is what Dr. Ruth looked like at 30.

The guys have to make out with a mannequin. This won't be awkward at all! Awe Simeon - i feel for the guy. he tries to put his hand in the mannequin's hair and the hair falls off. That wig was ill advised - bad prop department! bad!

Who wouldn't want to make out with these eyes?

The demonstrations of the erogenous zones by the sexologist on her assistant?! Hm, all of a sudden i get the feeling this woman is not a real doctor.

All the guys are sitting in exactly the same position after class.

Reward challenge- use the touching techniques on Erin in a dark room filled with pillows. Ok, this proves it - she is most definitely NOT a doctor. Winner gets Mystery in his ear!

Oh man - Simeon is not wearing his shirt, yikes....and he slobbers all over Erin. Todd - not creepy like Simeon, but sadly not aggressive enough. Matt does Ok. Greg does Ok too. Brian was kind of ridiculous. Rian completes the challenge in his own awkward way.
And...Matt wins the challenge and gets the mystery in his ear.

Kino escalation lesson...bla bla bla. Wow, Brian - TMI buddy - made out with a stack of ham. There's something very Hannibal Lecter about that.

Their elimination challenge is to kiss a woman in the club using Kino escalation. In all honesty, this is a lot to ask of these guys so early in the game.

Simeon starts talking to some Pennsylvania girls, I've heard about you....hahahhaha. Wait, what have you heard?! I'm from PA and there is very little interesting about me. (Except for this blog)

Mystery is making fun of Simeon's sad attempt at kino.... i think it's kind of working on Matador though.
Awe. Todd - poor guy, got shot down. Todd's note to self: don't try to hit on girls by whipping out a tiny meerkat.

Matt - oh FUCK that caper opener. NO NO NO hate it, but since he has the earbud it works. Oh wow, a woman pulls out a pair of underwear from her purse and shows them to him, but he ultimately gets a number an leaves without a kiss.

Greg uses a weather opener, while the coaches in the van argue that nobody gave him that, he bores the shit out of his new lady friends and they walk off.

Rian attempts to wipe an invisible piece of dust off the girls shoulder, which is weird, but somehow works to gets a group back to his table. Then comes the awkward back rub, but that seemed to work too because the girl went off and danced with him. He got the closest to a kiss, but he sort of ambushed the girl with a sneak attack kiss on the cheek.

another awesome caption
Brian - got shot down because he was way too overzealous.

Elimination Ceremony!
The medallions = ken (sp) which means enlightenment.

Lecture from Mystery - to paraphrase - "bla bla bla you guys are all way behind. You have only been doing this a few weeks and haven't mastered the completely awkward test of getting a kiss from a complete stranger".

Though he made it out unscathed because he's entertaining to watch, it seemed like Brian sort of deserved to be in the bottom 2 this week.

It's down to Todd and Greg - bye Todd. I really liked him and was sad to see him go. Sometimes as a viewer I can't help but resent Greg because it really seems like he is only getting by on his good looks. Poor Todd, he did pretty well the past couple weeks, but got the boot for his poor performance in the field. I blame it all on the toy meerkat.

Awe - he's crying, but in a very likable way. Bye buddy. The good news is, you can finally take that painful looking industrial piercing out of your ear.

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