CtS Movie Review: Across the Universe

y'all i'm watching Across the Universe right now and it is SO BAD. i mean, i'd heard it was bad, but i wasn't expecting this. and you all know i don't quit on movies just because they stink. so i decided to swallow this in little bites. since the movie is basically a cornytown, usa reenactment of one beatles song after the other, i decided to watch a song, take a break, then watch through the next song, and continue in this manner. i don't know if you guys know this, but there are a lot of Beatles songs. and i'm only about 45 minutes in (of 2:13). this flick is definitely headed towards the dreaded 1 star rating on netflix.

The Good Shepherd

After about a month and a half of neglecting The Good Shepherd, i finally decided to remove it from its coffee table home and watch the damn thing. i was waiting it out because i knew i probably had to be in a certain mood to watch it, and when that mood never came, i just bit the bullet. (i can't bring myself to send something back without watching it, just as i can't bring myself to walk out of a theater or turn off a movie that's terrible if i've been watching it from the beginning.) Normally, i watch my netflixed movies in my living room, and my netflixed tv shows in my bedroom. this is usually because i will watch something in bed to fall asleep to, and i'd rather it be something in shorter installments that i can watch piece by piece, instead of cutting a movie up into several portions. however, this was a special circumstance, and i was willing to watch the good shepherd in parts.

the first three nights, i only lasted about 30 minutes before falling asleep. i glanced at the sleeve of the disc and saw "2 hr 20 min" so figured i should step my game up. the next night i was able to watch about 45 mins, but when i glanced at the timecode, and it seemed nowhere near an end, i again checked the disc sleeve. Oh. 2 hours and 48 minutes. that's different.

i finally finished this flick last night and after 2 hours and 58 minutes of my life (i fell asleep the last ten minutes, and rewound to rewatch. unnecessary.), i cannot tell you what happened in that movie. i can tell you both matt damon and robert deniro were in it. angelina jolie was also in it. i know that angelina jolie attacks matt damon like a horny butterfly (?) and he learns that encounter impregnated her whilst macking on another girl. i also know that kid grew up in what seemed to be a parallel universe, because all of a sudden he was like 20, but angelina jolie and matt damon were still the same. i have no idea what the plot of the movie was, and i only know it had to do with the cia from stuff i read about it. i probably shouldn't have watched it in parts, but it also probably shouldn't have been 2 hrs and 48 minutes. nothing justified that. so yeah, aside from that, i either should have paid more attention, or robert deniro should've made a more interesting movie.

has anyone else seen it? were you actually paying attention? can you tell me what happened?

deep like an ocean

this week, on the blog...in an unprecedented move, there is at least one post every day of the week. what?! is someone around here unemployed?!

on sunday - a nekkid person disconcerts me

on monday - netflix wins us back

Donald Trump says something stupid, must be tuesday

wednesday, we get ahold of notes for a season 2 tila tequila meeting

thursday was Becca's Birthday and we celebrated by talking about summer television options

also, if you loved boot balance, then please help us out and come here and vote funny! we've got a special boot balance treat coming soon.

hooray for netflix!

a couple weeks ago, i got an email from netflix that gave me an angry face. it went something like this:



i was mad because the profile function is so important to me. i set up a separate queue for tv shows, so that when i send a tv disc in, i get one back. this way i won't ever have three tv discs at once, and i don't have to go in and alternate them. other people use them for more legitimate reasons like having a husband and wife queue, or monitoring their children's queues, etc. cooler than stupidlet ricky sent me an email with a petition threatening to lower our plan (some threatening to deflect to blockbuster) if they didn't reverse their decision. well, i just got this email in my inbox:





i hope there will soon be a tv movie of the week to document this heroic tale.

ps also notice how they are a team when they are delivering harsh news to us, and our friends when they are sucking up. oh netflix!