Previously: Kelsey suddenly was awesome but was then eliminated.
the girls head to panama city. florida. it's time to consolidate, so everyone is herded to the pink bus. both the blondes and the brunettes are offended at this. mindy says goodbye to the brunette's safe haven and the blue bus says bye to mindy. really. it talks and flashes its headlights. big john brings the girls bikinis and they attack him like a pack of lions on a helpless zebra. the girls meet bret at a kiddie pool. he tells them he's giving some army ladies a day off while the girls take care of their kids. we learn that brittanya has a kid. lord help that child. isn't it weird that a total dumbhead slut like brittanya can have a child but perfectly well adjusted gay couples can't in some states. we learn that actually most of these skanks have at least one kid. but what's actually surprising is that ashley is great with kids and seems like she's probably a good mom. the children vote and it's between ashley and taya. bret ultimately makes the final decision and ashley wins the big solo date. her first, which is another surprise.
beverly downs a lot of vodka and then the whole group goes out to a bar. beverly gets kind of passive aggressive with bret. he tells her she has anger issues. bret then wonders if farrah is just there to party and make out with ashley. they head back on the bus where bret is all handsy and mouthsy with everyone and beverly sits furious in a corner. they all go to a beach bonfire, leaving bev on the bus. mindy and taya are disgusted by bret making out with brittanya and ashley at the same time. they go to the bathroom and then the hot tub. topless. beverly eventually joins the party, gets disgusted with bret, yells some shit and leaves again. ashley, brittanya, and farrah run to pee, and thus bret is left alone with jamie. they of course make out. isn't anybody worried about the herp?
mindy and taya shower together and gossip about someone. farrah assumes its her, pulls the shower curtain on them, and then bitches them out. then ashley pours salsa in mindy's suitcase (over the line and so uncalled for). then brittanya joins them in pouring shampoo/mousse/other bathroom products on them. mindy and taya get their own new hotel room for their troubles.
ashley meets up with bret, who says she looks "all kind of awesome." hmm. they go ATVing (RIP leroi moore) through the dunes to a lunch table. he talks about some people being there for the wrong reasons and ashley knows he's totally talking about farrah and is upset about it. look at that, a true friendship.
bret has a couple one on ones whilst at the hotel gym, pretending to lift weights. farrah and beverly both have a chat with him as he tries to suss out their intentions.
eliminations. ashley, of course, gets the first pass because she's totally winning this. jamie is called second for that beach makeout session. mindy is third, followed by brittanya and beverly. this leaves farrah and taya. he is dubious of both of their intentions and commitment to him, wondering if they are just there for the party and the air time, respectively. in the end, he calls farrah down and dumps her ass. sad for ashley.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
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